GooPHub is the home for half-baked ideas that go in raw and come out permanently carbonized. Free hosting for repos, regrets, and the lingering smell of burnt peanuts that never quite leaves the office.
Today's most thoroughly ruined peanuts, sorted by char.
Computer vision model that pinpoints the exact moment a peanut crosses from "roasted" to "crime scene." 99.9% accurate, 0% useful after the fact.
A firmware patch that mutes your smoke detector for exactly as long as it takes to remember the peanuts are still in the oven.
A timer app that always rounds up. Always. Originally designed for roasting peanuts, now responsible for three missed flights.
A binary classifier with exactly 50% accuracy, which is somehow worse than just guessing. Tech debt: immeasurable. Smell: also immeasurable.
A cookbook where every single recipe — regardless of ingredients, oven, or intent — ends with the same step: "remove ashes, apologize."
An e-commerce starter kit for selling things that should probably come with a warning label, an oven mitt, and a small fire extinguisher.
A computer vision pipeline that watches your oven through a webcam and tells you, with great confidence and zero remorse, that it's already too late.
A lightweight vision model trained on 40,000 hours of kitchen footage to detect the precise frame where "golden brown" becomes "structural failure." Runs on any webcam pointed vaguely at an oven.
pip install optimal-char-detector --no-warrantyfrom char_detector import watch
watch(camera=0, alert="too_late")alert="too_late" earlier does not help.v2 will detect char level before you've even started preheating, giving you a full head start on disappointment.